Faith Filled Family

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with Steve Demme

Loving Others as Jesus Has Loved Us typography

nytime I can pause and reflect on the nature of Jesus, I am encouraged and challenged. Jesus was and is the most loving being who has ever set foot on the earth. He was a perfect Son and a perfect Savior. He is God in the flesh for all the world to see. He walked among the inhabitants of Israel for thirty years and lived intimately with twelve.

There is one sentence that He uttered in John 13 and 15 which has transformed my understanding of what it means to love my wife and children well. “Love one another: just as I have loved you.” It’s become my Magna Carta for how to love.

Loving others flows from our inner nature. It stems from the hidden man of the heart. If I want to love well, I must be transformed from within. One attribute or characteristic of Jesus that I want to focus on today is His humility. His meek and lowly heart.

On the eve of His crucifixion, Jesus was teaching His disciples and uttered these amazing two sentences, which many of us have memorized.

“I am the way, and the truth, and the life; no one comes to the Father except through Me.”

His next sentence was:

“If you had known Me, you would have known My Father also; from now on you know Him, and have seen Him.”

— John 14:6–7, NKJV

Philip, after spending so much time with Jesus, still was not comprehending this truth and asked:

“‘Lord, show us the Father, and it is enough for us.’ Jesus said to him, ‘Have I been with you so long, and you still do not know Me, Philip? Whoever has seen Me has seen the Father. How can you say, “Show us the Father”? Do you not believe that I am in the Father and the Father is in Me?’”

— John 14:8–10a, NKJV

Jesus is God, in the flesh. He is God incarnate. When we see Jesus, we see God the Father. As Jesus said:

“I and the Father are one.”

— John 10:30

With this thought in mind consider:

“Take My yoke upon you, and learn of Me; for I am meek and lowly in heart.”

— Matthew 11:29

Another translation renders meek and lowly as gentle and humble. We can deduce that God, the mighty God Who inhabits eternity, is also gentle and humble. Since He is God and does not change, He is, and always will be, humble.

“Our King did not demand our submission or that we respect Him. He chose not to be served, but to serve.”

cropped photo of someone sitting at a table and using their hand to keep a book open to read

As I have studied this concept in more depth I’ve discovered several passages which corroborate this attribute:

“Behold, My servant Whom I have chosen, My beloved with Whom My soul is well pleased. I will put My Spirit upon Him, and He will proclaim justice to the Gentiles. He will not quarrel or cry aloud, nor will anyone hear His voice in the streets; a bruised reed He will not break, and a smoldering wick He will not quench.”

— Matthew 12:18, NKJV

King Jesus

But Jesus called them to Himself and said:

“You know that the rulers of the Gentiles lord it over them, and those who are great exercise authority over them. Yet it shall not be so among you; but whoever desires to become great among you, let him be your servant. And whoever desires to be first among you, let him be your slave—just as the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give His life a ransom for many.”

— Matthew 20:25–28, NKJV

Our King did not demand our submission or that we respect Him. He chose not to be served, but to serve. He was not a ruler in the manner of the Gentiles who lorded it over his subjects and expected his citizens to die for him, but a servant King who died for His subjects.

When King Jesus entered Jerusalem to the accolades of His followers, they would have expected a king to be mounted on a magnificent white stallion. Instead, He came on a colt.

“Say to the daughter of Zion, ‘Behold, your King is coming to you, humble, and mounted on a donkey, on a colt, the foal of a beast of burden.’”

— Matthew 21:5, ESV

Moses

A month ago, if I had been asked to list attributes of God I don’t think “humble” would have made the top ten. Yet God declares He and His Son are meek and lowly, humble and gentle. Since He is, then it makes sense that so are His followers. Consider Moses, who was used of God to lead an entire nation out of Egypt.

“Now the man Moses was very meek, more than all people who were on the face of the earth.”

— Numbers 12:3, ESV

Paul

Paul and his team of Christ followers were described as gentle nursing mothers.

“We never came with flattering speech, as you know, nor with a pretext for greed—God is witness—nor did we seek glory from men, either from you or from others, even though as apostles of Christ we might have asserted our authority. But we proved to be gentle among you, as a nursing mother tenderly cares for her own children.”

— 1 Thessalonians 2:5–7, NASB95

As this knowledge has penetrated my thinking and spirit, I understand afresh Paul’s exhortation:

“Have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus, who, though He was in the form of God, did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, but emptied Himself, by taking the form of a servant, being born in the likeness of men. And being found in human form, He humbled himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross.”

— Philippians 2:5–8, ESV

I noticed this theme in more of his writings:

“I therefore, a prisoner for the Lord, urge you to walk in a manner worthy of the calling to which you have been called, with all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love, eager to maintain the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace.”

— Ephesians 4:1–3, ESV

“Put on then, as God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience.”

— Colossians 3:12, ESV

and

“…to speak evil of no one, to avoid quarreling, to be gentle, and to show perfect courtesy toward all people.”

— Titus 3:2, ESV

“How I interact with others begins inside, in my heart of hearts.”

Confession

In years past I have aspired to be the patriarch of my home. As such, I expected submission and respect from my wife and children. I have apologized for my error and for the subsequent behaviors which followed this attitude. I was acting as a Gentile ruler would act, not as the King who entered Jerusalem mounted on a colt.

As a husband, dad, and grandfather, I aspire and hope to be meek and humble and gentle. How I interact with others begins inside, in my heart of hearts. When I am becoming meek and lowly of heart, my tongue and actions will follow suit. As my mind is being renewed and transformed by this awesome truth, I sense God’s Spirit changing me, making me more like my Savior and God.

Zephaniah provides a wonderful benediction for those of us who aspire to embody and reflect our Savior:

“Seek the Lord, all you meek of the earth, who have upheld His justice. Seek righteousness, seek humility. It may be that you will be hidden in the day of the Lord’s anger.”

— Zephaniah 2:3, NKJV

“Blessed are the meek, for they shall inherit the earth.”

— Matthew 5:5, NASB

I want to love those near and dear to me as Jesus loved me.

teve Demme and his wife Sandra have been married since 1979. They have been blessed with four sons, three lovely daughters-in-law, and six special grandchildren. Their fourth son has Down syndrome and lives with them in Lititz, PA. Steve has served in full or part-time pastoral ministry for many years after graduating from Gordon-Conwell Theological Seminary. He is the creator of Math-U-See and the founder of Building Faith Families.

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