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hand writing out Dear Durenda with a pen
You homeschooled all of your sons from kindergarten to graduation. In what ways did their education look different from your daughters’ education?
W

e had two girls first, then four boys in a row, a girl, and then another boy. I remember that by the time our first son was a toddler, I had already begun to notice the difference in the things he was interested in and how he absorbed knowledge.

We chose to take an unhurried approach as our kids entered the school years and this was particularly beneficial for our boys.

Since boys tend to develop up to two years slower than girls in the early years, the unhurried approach allowed them to grow a love for learning by giving them the freedom to learn about things that were interesting to them and in ways that resonated with their stage of development.

They all caught up to the girls eventually, but because they were allowed to do so at their own pace, they became confident in their learning style.

One of the other differences I noticed between our sons and daughters was the level of physical energy the boys had compared to the girls. They had an innate desire to move almost constantly. They also typically learned better by experiencing things hands-on and if I used fewer words instead of more.

They didn’t have the same desire to be relational in their studies and preferred to do things independently, especially when they got older. I encouraged this independence even when it meant they had to struggle through problems on their own. The struggle was necessary and encouraged their desire to conquer.

When we understand the way boys are hardwired by their Creator to lead, build, protect, provide, and conquer, it can help shift our approach to their home education so that it is more effective and efficient. Often that means simplifying.

In my new book I wrote:
“Yes, we want our boys to learn excellence and to become skilled, but they are not going to be gifted in every area. Finding what they are good at and refining their skills is a process that requires us to know our boys well and to know what is working for them and what is not—and to be patient.”

—Raising Boys to Men, by Durenda Wilson
Boys are amazing, challenging, wonderful, and full of energy. The key is to know what to do with that and how to direct it in ways that will ultimately grow them from a boy to a man!
-Durenda