Do not assume homeschooling is as lovely as it appears in any home in which you haven’t been a fly-on-the-wall for a full unit study. If you have no front row seat to view another family’s daily routine or witness math at their kitchen table (or under it), their attempts at pointless crafts, and forced family photos, you likely give other homeschool families more credit for perfection than is deserved.

Only believe 75% of what your friends offer of their homeschool endeavors. Then, imagine what they don’t share and use it to fill in the intentionally untold parts of the story. That way, you can continue to like them for the real people they are, with cracks and insecurities just like yourself.

Why? Because at the very least, we all have a pile of abandoned curriculum, botched attempts at science, and bad attitudes we don’t speak of in polite society, right?

Ahem… Right!?

If I were to write a resume of our homeschool accomplishments over the last 10+ years that left out the gritty grime we sweep under the rug before company arrives, you might think we cracked the code for homeschooling boys or that I lie like a dusty British novel next to a video game console. After all, this year we’re graduating university-bound twins who know Jesus and the dangers of credit card debt.

But just so you know, despite our very real homeschool success…

Why? Because at the very least, we all have a pile of abandoned curriculum, botched attempts at science, and bad attitudes we don’t speak of in polite society, right?

Ahem… Right!?

If I were to write a resume of our homeschool accomplishments over the last 10+ years that left out the gritty grime we sweep under the rug before company arrives, you might think we cracked the code for homeschooling boys or that I lie like a dusty British novel next to a video game console. After all, this year we’re graduating university-bound twins who know Jesus and the dangers of credit card debt.

But just so you know, despite our very real homeschool success…

And that’s why my kids are interesting people to talk to and prefer their grilled cheese a little on the burnt side.

Best homeschool friends (like me) not only share the stuff that works, but keep it real and admit (and possibly embellish) their mistakes and less-than-stellar moments for these reasons:

1. Personal ventilation.
2. To balance out the time they spend bragging about their kids.
3. For moral support and a reason to meet for coffee.
4. Misery loves company.
5. To establish a character witness.
6. Laughter.

Homeschooling mistakes are often made from a place of love and wishful thinking. Lack of experience, forethought, or follow-through are often the catalyst for mishaps that start small brush fires and leave a mark on our confidence. But these little fires can be put out and the battle scars left toughen the skin with experience and knowledge. They can also lead to some hilarious tales of woe and warnings over coffee when you get to meet friends once every third full moon.

 

1.

Tuning in late: “I just discovered my kid hasn’t done a math lesson in two months. Pray I don’t kill him. I need to rethink everything.”

Spoiler alert: He lived. Even graduated.
Tip: Do not go more than twenty-four to forty-eight hours without checking a kid’s progress.

1. Tuning in late: “I just discovered my kid hasn’t done a math lesson in two months. Pray I don’t kill him. I need to rethink everything.”

Spoiler alert: He lived. Even graduated.
Tip: Do not go more than twenty-four to forty-eight hours without checking a kid’s progress.

 2. Miscalculated curriculum: “We just can’t do all this in a reasonable amount of time each week. My eyes were clearly bigger than my kid’s appetite for written work. And now I need to rethink everything.”

3.  Waste of time/money activities: “I bought $75 worth of supplies and pay $65 a month for art class tuition, and they’ve been drawing and redrawing an apple in pencil for two months! Why am I paying for this? I need to rethink everything.”

4. Bad attitudes: “She yelled. I yelled. Then I told her I didn’t care if she didn’t finish her biology course either. And now I feel awful ‘cause I do care. She wants to be a veterinarian for crying out loud! I need to rethink everything.”

5. We’re not that homeschool: “We grow vegetables, read aloud as a family, and give home haircuts, so I thought we might as well raise chickens. But y’all, I’m secretly glad the coyotes got in the pen. We’re not as homeschool as I thought. I need to rethink everything.”

6. Socialization sucks the fun out of field trips: “The kids were all disjointed ages, abilities, and attention spans, and everyone had a stroller and a set of grandparents. We might as well have arrived on a tour bus. We were herded around like cattle. It was all watered down and rushed. Good gravy! Did we really just quit a homeschool group for being too socialized? I need to rethink everything.”

Reminiscing the homeschool mistakes of others is funny because it’s real and relatable. It helps us see where we need to lighten up. When we fumble there might be immediate feelings of failure and an urge to rethink everything. Especially if you falsely assume you are the only one with issues and most other homeschool families have it perfectly together. Be kind to yourself, and remember others aren’t sharing and airing everything real and interesting.

Focus on your family and look for the learning that comes with the mistakes and road bumps along the way. What doesn’t work out may be God steering you onto the path He wants for your family. Unlike the hopelessly flawed school system, you can fix problems immediately. Don’t waste time feeling sorry or inadequate. Forgive yourself, then act to right the situation.

And welcome the occasions to laugh when the drama clears!

Allow me to be cliché…

Rome wasn’t built in a day.
And rebuilding the colosseum with sugar cubes is useless crafting but probably better than drawing an apple over and over for two months.

What doesn’t kill us makes us stronger.
And improves time management skills.

This too shall pass.
And then there’s algebra II.

The grass is always greener on the other side.
And weeds are green too. Just saying…

We’re not laughing at you; we’re laughing with you.
Misery Hopeful humorous tenacity loves company.