Dear Durenda typography with an image of a hand, writing

How do we know it will be enough?

I listen to your podcast weekly and loved The Unhurried Homeschooler. Everything you say meets that belief in my heart that unhurried homeschooling is right for our family. You soothe my heart.

My ongoing battle, and probably every mum asks herself this, is: how do we know it will be enough? I know it is enough now, but what about when they are older?

I have friends whose children do several hours more schoolwork than my children of the same age – rigorous, Charlotte Mason/Classical style. It works for them, which is wonderful, but I worry. Sometimes it makes me doubt that I’m not taking this seriously enough (even though I know I am) because we don’t look “serious.”

I guess I just need encouragement that this will all work out okay!

Sarah typography

Sarah, I have been there many times along the way in our twenty-six-year homeschooling journey! The truth is that even if a mom is doing “all the things,” there is no way to know if those things are “enough.” It’s one of the challenges of living the homeschool life and we need to exercise discipline in not allowing it to consume us or distract us from what’s best for our kids.

Very early on, I asked myself an important question: “If I could raise and homeschool my kids with no one else’s opinion in the mix, what would that look like?” In other words, what was actually on my heart? What might God be whispering to me about my own specific children? Those answers are what made things so much clearer for me.

When we started homeschooling, there was no social media, internet, etc. There were significantly fewer people homeschooling and almost all of them seemed to be quite focused on academics. Like every homeschooling mom, I had to decide what voices I would allow to influence the direction of our family.

I felt God leading me into a more unhurried approach with our kids, but every now and then I would look over the “fence” to see what others were doing and felt unsure. The problem was that almost anytime I tried to become more “serious” (too academic) about our homeschooling plan, it didn’t go well. Both my kids and I would get frustrated and overwhelmed. It sucked the life out of our family and destroyed the peace in our home, so I stayed the course and focused on being content with what God clearly had for us. It was a walk of faith.

Like you, I wondered how things would look as my kids got older. I had to find confidence and rest over and over in the fact that God knew the future, that He knew and loved my kids way more than I did, and that He was faithfully leading us. He just wanted me to relax and enjoy the journey.

What I eventually found out was that taking an unhurried approach actually made our kids more passionate about learning as they got older. They weren’t burned out at a young age like so many students often were. They loved learning, were quite comfortable with how they learned best, and successfully moved forward with confidence in the ways that worked for them! Our children aren’t computers or robots. They have a spirit, soul, and body, and when all of those things are working together, learning happens effectively and efficiently. Our job is to facilitate what God is orchestrating each day.

“The most effective form of learning educates the whole person, but it doesn’t happen overnight. It happens by sowing one tiny seed at a time, then watering, feeding, nurturing, and covering it all in prayer. No one forces a garden to grow. Instead, we work with what God has given us and follow his lead. We don’t plant delicate seeds when there is still the danger of frost. We don’t water when it’s already rained. We pay attention to keeping a balance of all the conditions that will encourage the healthiest growth. It’s not mechanical; it’s organic.”

—from The 4 Hour School Day by Durenda Wilson

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